There are times when life can look perfectly fine from the outside. You have a good job, people you love, a comfortable home, and plenty to be grateful for. Nothing is obviously wrong.

And yet, you feel stuck.

I completely relate to this experience. There have been times when I’ve looked at my own life and wondered why I wasn’t happier when there was so much that was good.

We often describe this feeling as “going through the motions.” We wake up, work, take care of what needs to be done, go to bed, and start again. We are participating in our lives, but sometimes it doesn’t feel that way.

So I get curious about the phrase going through the motions.

How does going through the motions make you unhappy?

Maybe it isn’t unhappiness at all. Maybe what you’re missing is something to look forward to. You want to laugh more, be spontaneous, wake up curious about the day, or do something simply because you want to do it.

What if feeling stuck doesn’t mean there is something wrong with your life?

When two parts of your life start pulling against each other

Imagine two sides of yourself playing tug of war.

One side values the life you have built. It may be predictable and repetitive at times and it is also comfortable, responsible, and good.

The other side wants to feel excited, spontaneous, curious, and playful.

As the two sides pull against each other, imagine a knot forming in the middle of the rope. The harder each side pulls, the tighter the knot becomes.

Now imagine both sides putting the rope down.

There is nothing wrong with either side. You don’t have to choose one over the other. Instead, imagine walking over to the knot and becoming curious about it.

If you touched the knot, what would it want in order to relax and loosen?

Maybe the answer is permission.

Permission to want something simply because it makes you happy. Permission to do something that isn’t productive or useful. Permission to stop believing that enjoyment has to wait until everything else is finished.

How does it feel to give yourself that permission?

What happens when the knot begins to loosen?

Maybe you notice a little more lightness. Maybe you feel playful. Nothing about your circumstances has changed, yet suddenly there seems to be more room in your life.

Now return to the knot.

What happens to it when you bring that lighter, more playful energy to both sides?

Perhaps it doesn’t disappear. It simply becomes softer. The strands have room to move. Responsibility and play no longer have to pull against each other.

You can be responsible and spontaneous.

You can appreciate the life you have and want more excitement.

You can have routines and interrupt an ordinary Tuesday by turning on music and dancing around the kitchen.

Sometimes feeling stuck doesn’t mean you need a different life. It may simply mean that a part of you hasn’t had enough room in the life you already have.

You might discover that the change you’ve been looking for isn’t about leaving something behind. It’s about giving yourself permission to invite something back in.

If you can imagine more lightness and playful energy in your life now, what is one simple way it wants to be invited into your day?